lying

This is going to be a horrible emo post but I am sorry if I have to post this and affect all your moods..psps...

If only you knew how much you actually hurt me...If you wanted some time to rest and breathe..why not just say it out?If you wanted a break till promos..why didnt you just say so?It may just because you do not want to hurt me or anything..but its worst when you keep it built inside and expect me to guess..Its this that is really hurting me...It was until today when I finally cannot stand my own sadness and pain and was writing an extra super emo entry under ur hse block..(I post this in my old extreme emo blog ) but that is not the point..I sense that there is something wrong..and was thinking that I am being thrown aside and ignored with each growing day..well for more info go dig my emo blog for the emo crap (trust me its not good for your health)

Anyway, if not for lihe telling me to talk out with you and not do things in a fit of emotions in case I regret or something, I would have done something drastic(I wont kill myself though lolx) and cause more trouble.So thanks lihe..and i initially wanted to sms you this in answer for the break till after promos cus I was frustrated.."Even better.Until then, you can keep husky because I dont want to see it at all.." because it will hurt me..but after much talking with lihe on the phone (ouch my phone bills) and her asking Qns about whether I really like/love addy...(I answered dunno to all =x)..ya I changed my sms to something more of what I really will want to say calmly..

1st.
QNS: When one day addy just tell you that he didnt like you anymore, how will you feel/react? Ans to lihe: *pause.......Dunno
Real Ans: I hate to admit..but I will really feel heartbroken and go into a state of depression until I eventually recover(but I wont kill myself)

2nd.
QNS: Do you wish to see him/miss him a lot if he goes away for a long time?
Ans to lihe: *pause...........Dunno
Real Ans: Yes.No point running away from my feelings and denying them.

3rd.
QNS: If a better guy appears and attempt to chase you, will you abandon addy?
Ans to lihe: *longer pause...................Dunno
Real Ans: No. Unless if addy choose to dump me..if he refuse to believe me..then I think I may consider breaking but will not fall for the better guy instantly.

OkOKok I cant rmb the rest...nvm anyway..did a lot of soul searching...but my heart still hurts..because you didnt tell me and made yourself and me miserable...at least on the bright side..it is resolved and no more complications of this matter.

Post rating: isnt it obvious? 0% happy 100% emo (hopefully no more such posts again)

Quote of the day: Even if you do not want to hurt me..can you please dont lie?